Today for You -- Tomorrow for Me

How was YOUR Weekend?

I had another "one of those" weekends. I don't expect you to read all of this--it's fucking long. I'm just typing it out because I have to get it out. But don't forget to scroll down to the end to hear Part II of the funny church tapes.

Friday night a whole slew of us (Ryan and Amanda, Mark, Jay and Jeffy) went to see Saw II. It was much better than what the critics said. Everyone in our group liked it, despite it being horrific and gory at times. There were a couple of times I had to look down. Come to think of it,

I'm not sure what was more disturbing--the graphic images or the fact that Jay giggled like a little girl during some horrific moments. I'm sorry Jay... but watching a guy dig out his eye with a scalpel to get a key surgically implanted is NOT funny.

After the movie, Jeffy hooked me up with some extra strength Tylenol to help ease my aches and pains.

Saturday's a rugby day.

I got up, ate breakfast, drank some coffee and relaxed until game time. We were playing the Tempe Old Devils. I can assure you there was nothing old about their backs. They were all under the age of 25 and as fleet footed as Mercury. It was a bit of a disappointing game for me personally. Within the first 10 minutes, I managed to aggravate a groin strain and stripped about one inch of skin off the underside of one of my toes.

I was in excruciating pain (do you know what it feels like when bare flesh rubs up against socks while wearing cleats?) and could barely run until half time. Jay was kind enough to help bandage up my toe. But then he decided to play Saw II and rubbed an alcohol pad on on my cut knee that was dripping blood. OUCH!!!

We kinda got clobbered. We only had two substitutes and the Old Devils kept putting in fresh bodies. And due to the fact that I had no lateral movement, I blew about 300 defensive tackles. So Coach switched me from fullback to inside center, which was a little better. But it was so frustrating not being able to move well and to be in pain from my stupid toe. Oh well.

At the drinkup a bunch of guys said they were going to the Halloween Costume Party at BS West. I wasn't going to go, but thought it would be fun if a bunch of us were going. I called Jeffy on my way home and told him we were going.

So, I cleaned up and and watched horror flicks until Jeffy came over. He mixed up some KICKASS Blue Margaritas. They were super yummy. Strong but tasty. I threw on my Russian uniform and out the door we flew.

When we got to BS there was a huge line out the door. I thought we wouldn't have to wait in line since we had purchased our tickets online. I was wrong (we were supposed to wait) but ended up cutting in towards the front anyway. Jeff came up and said, "Um. Did we just cut in line cuz those angels are giving us dirty looks?" I told Jeff to just look straight ahead and pretty nothing happened.

The party was fun. There were a lot of fun costumes and they had a huge stage. The show was arecreation of Solid Gold. Unfortunately, they forgot that all of the guests on Solid Gold lip-synched. Some of the talent decided to sing live. SG was one of my all time favorite shows when I was a kid. Chelsea was my favorite dancer and Marilyn McCoo was my favorite host.

Steve and his friends were there, so we hung out with them all night. For some reason all of the rugby guys NEVER SHOWED.

I ran into a bunch of people I hadn't seen in years, which is always fun.

But then things got a little weird. A friend who will remain nameless text messaged me saying he wanted "to go home" with me.

Then Steve and I had a little discussion. But first let me back up to Thursday...
Thursday I decided to ask Steve out on a date. He said he wanted to but he'd have to think about it because he knew I didn't want to date anyone who wasn't out of the closet, etc. He then told me we'd talk about it that weekend.

So, towards the end of the evening, I asked him what his answer was. He kind of stuttered and stumbled. So I cut him off and said, "Don't worry about it. It's not a big deal. We'll be friends and I'm totally okay with that." Of course, I was a little hurt because I really like him a lot. But it's not the end of the world. And I really do want to be friends--more would have been nice but just friends is good too! :-)

So we all hung out some more. Then Jeff and I decided to find my friend Charles. Plus, I needed to get away. Five minutes later Steve calls me on my cell phone and tells me to meet him in the middle of the lot. So I did. Then he proceeded to tell me that he wished I had said something earlier and that he was a simple person and he couldn't date two people at once.

WHA-WHA-WHAAT???

Umm, we've been hanging out for over a month and he's never mentioned a boyfriend.

So, I apologized and said I would have never asked him out if I had known he was seeing someone. Then he grabbed me and kissed me. I kissed him back (of course). And then I grabbed Jeff and we high-tailed it outta there.

We didn't make it to the car before Steve called again and asked to meet him real quick. Yadda yadda yadda, made out some more, he and his friends said I could go home with them, I said no, end of story. I think the most bizarre part of this dramaturgy is that he said I intimidated him. Well, I think I'm a pretty unassuming guy--I mean, I voice my opinions on stuff but I'm pretty laid back. Maybe I see myself incorrectly.

There's more to the weekend, but this post is already too long.

Here's the next audio installment of funny church recordings. This is pretty damned funny. Imagine taking your 6 year old child to church and hearing this. It's called Preacher. One of the best lines in it is: Your butt ain't made for that!

You should try it in heels!

Rugby

OK. I've decided that since there are so many Rent haters out there I'm going to reference it in the title or a lyric in the body just to annoy people. :-P

Today Erin from the art department and I headed over to Channel 3 for a taping of Your Life A to Z. Ft. Mc Dowell Casino is having a huge costume party and asked Echo to provide two people to dress up in costume. So, Erin went looking like a female version of the Lost Boys.

I decided that I would give my rugby team a plug. I got some makeup and created a pretty cool looking gash on my forehead--it doesn't look too good in the picture but it did in real life. I also added some bruises and blood to my face.

The funny part was, I didn't need to do anything for my legs. I have a bruise that's bigger than my hand on the inner part of my thigh of my left leg (note arrow). I also have significant scrapes and bruises on my right knee (note other arrow). This doesn't even count the two fingers on my left hand that I can't straighten out because they got jammed the other night at practice. I guess I could have wrapped tape around them.

In addition to those real injuries my groin is seriously strained and the upper right side of my back is seriously sore. I can't turn in bed or else it's like a knife in my back. Same with the act of laying down or getting up. I don't know what the hell I did but it hurts.

Despite hurting like hell, I'm really looking forward to Saturday's game against the Tempe Old Devils.

In other news, my friend Stephen from New York e-mailed me three sound files. They are recordings from church services and are so fucking funny. I've listened to them a half dozen times and I still laugh unctrollably. To the point tears are running down my face. I'm going to stream them all over the next three posts.

Here's the first one. If you're having a bad day, listen to this and you'll crack up. It's entitled: Can You Hit That Note?

La Vie Boheme

Rent

Can I tell you just how psyched I am about Rent the movie? I can't. Words alone will not come close to how excited I am to see this movie. I haven't been this excited for a movie since The Lord of the Rings Trilogy. Jay may be a geek, but I'm a Rent geek.

Now, I'm not a true Rent head. I haven't seen the show over 50 times (I've only seen it five times) and I couldn't tell you the cast differences between the Angel touring company and the Benny touring company (but my friend Bryan could). But I did get to see it on Broadway with most of the original cast intact and I stood outside the doors after the show and got everyone's autographs.

A lot of people don't like the show. I mentioned it to Jeff and he practically threw up at the mention of it.

But to me, it's just amazing.

Why?

In my opinion (I could be wrong on this one), it's the first Gen X'er musical ever written. I mean except for Jesus Christ Superstar most musicals are written with blue haired ladies in mind. They've got soaring melodies and beautiful arias. Even Tommy, a rock musical by The Who, sounded like elevator music when it hit the Broadway stage.

But Rent had guitars and drums and a keyboardist and that's about it. It managed to have awesome melodies but with a kick to them.

Not only was the music more intense than the typical Broadway fare, the content was really racy for its day (it opened on Broadway in 1996). The lead characters had HIV/AIDS, were prostitutes, had sex, were gay, abused drugs and generally weren't the nicest people in the world. But they were written in such a way that you really cared about them.

Although I'm not big on romantic story lines (they're so damned cheesy), I love the relationships portrayed in Rent. One of my favorite songs is sung by Angel (a drag queen) and Collins (a college professor). It's called I'll Cover You. Although the lyrics read sappy, they're really sweet when sung:

Live in my house
I'll be your shelter
Just pay me back
With one thousand kisses
Be my lover -- I'll cover you

I took Kevin to see it once. The week after we saw it, he had 1,000 Hershey Kisses delivered to my office. How fucking awesome is that?

The movie comes out the day before Thanksgiving. I might be sick that day (just kidding Buddy). I hope they don't screw it up. I'm happy that they brought back the entire original cast (well everyone but Mimi and Joanne). The movie soundtrack is much harder--guitars and drums have been kicked up a notch, but they cut some songs and altered others. It better work damnit!!!

Here's the Original Broadway Cast singing the opening song, Rent.

Do It for the Kids

What a weekend.

Friday afternoon, Neil Giuliano took me out to lunch. He's in town for the weekend. Now that he's the head honcho for GLAAD, he lives partly in LA and NY. He likes to say that he's bicoastal. But the way he says it implies something entirely different. ;-)

Friday I went home, showered and then drove up to Steve's. We got pizza and beer at Red Devil Pizza. It was good shiznit. We ate and talked and had a good time. Then we headed over to a house party (much to my dismay Kid N Play did NOT make an appearance).

The party was being thrown for two guys celebrating birthdays. I didn't know either people. In fact, I only knew Steve and casually knew one or two other people. I told Steve that I hadn't been to a non-rugby party in so long that it felt weird (especially knowing the rugby boys were having a game night). But half an hour later, our hooker, Gary, showed up. So, I felt a little better after that.

The party was interesting. Two people accused me of being straight. And one guy accused me of wearing my Velvet Revolver shirt because it was trendy and not because I was a fan. Then another guy told me he was disappointed in Velvet Revolver's CD. I was getting a little annoyed at this uncultured group of people. ;-)

After the party, Gary, Greg, Steve and I headed over to Charlie's for a bit. A fight broke out less than a foot away from me. Some guy got punched and blood squirted all over the pool table. Finally I took Steve home and crashed.

Saturday night Kevin and I went to Amsterdam for Neil's birthday bash. I can't stand going to Amsterdam. I always feel terribly uncomfortable there. It's full of pretentious guys who stand and model the latest fashions. I usually try to dress down as much as possible when I go there just to make a statement.

As I was on my to Amsterdam Steve text messaged me that he was all "homoed up" -- he had gone shopping and bought nice homo clothes--button down shirt and nice pants and shoes. I text messaged him back that I was going to make fun of him when I saw him, but he looked so damned attractive I couldn't. *sigh*

Kevin and I stayed for about an hour and half which is 90 minutes too long for me. I wanted to go to Charlie's because the rugby boys text messaged me that they were there but Kevin hates Charlie's. We drove to Roscoes but there were only 8 people in there, so we called it an early night.
Sunday I drove over to Tony's house. Tony has season tickets to the Cardinals games and he always takes me to one. It's fun, but good Lord it's fucking hot. It was 90 degrees and the sun just beats down on you.

After the game, I came home, showered, ate and ran over to this creepy bar called Nu Towne for rugby recruiting night. The beauty of Nu Towne is they have $1 draft Bud Lights for Sunday beer bust. Yeah me! Boo my poor liver.

Jeffy came which made the evening much more fun. He cracks me up with his observations.

Since the point of us going to Nu Towne was to recruit guys, Jeff kept pointing out guys we should approach. Two princesses with faux muscles came barreling into the bar. I asked them if they wanted to play rugby but they said they didn't want to get hurt. What's the point of having muscles if you don't use them besides lifting weights and looking ridiculous in too tight t-shirts?

Jason Adonis called while I was there and ended up showing up. One of my teammates was working Jason Adonis pretty hard. I was pissed for about 60 seconds and then it became comical. I had no reason to be pissed. JA and I are not in a relationship and honestly I like someone else right now.

So JA told me to follow him home and yadda yadda yadda, I got home 3 hours later.

So, that was my weekend. I have two goals to accomplish this week.
1)Drink less beer.
2)I'd also like to develop a switch for my emotions. I've got a stupid crush on someone and it's not going away. It's VERY frustrating. So, I'd like to just switch it off, be friends with him and be happy with that. I'll keep you all posted on how it goes.

Since I got so much shit for my VR shirt, I figured I'd stream one of their songs. This is one of my favorites. It's called Do It for the Kids. Lyrics for the curious are here.

Let's Play House!

Domestic Bliss

So Tuesday is my pretend family day. Jay and I play tennis in a league at our gym. We don't start until 7:30, so Jay comes over my house after work and we have this funny little routine setup.

I get home around 5:20. I unload the dishwasher and start setting up for dinner. Jay gets to the house between 5:30 and 6:00. He takes off his tennis shoes and grunts as he collapses on the couch. I fill up a glass of water for him, take it over and ask him how his day went.

While he tells me about his day, I interrupt with questions (mustard or mayo on the sandwich? do you want stuffed pork chops or baked chicken?). Then I heat up his dinner as we watch the national news.

At 6, we switch over to Lifetime for The Golden Girls and laugh as we eat our dinner. After dinner, he lays on the couch with the kids (Duke and Hera) and I turn on the heating pad to warm up my wrist.

Then it's time for tennis! It's very Norman Rockwellian and humorous, especially since I'm not domestic at all. I mean, the dinner is precooked by Kevin.

Today the guy I was supposed to play never showed. So I played Matt again. Once again I was on fire and beat him 6-0, 6-3. I wonder when the streak is going to end. :-(

The weather here has been crazy. It's been chilly and cloudy with some rain. It's making me wish I was dating someone. That doesn't happen very often. Usually, I'm so busy that I'm glad I don't have that kind of responsibility. But the past couple of days, I've wanted someone to lay in bed with (someone who isn't a trick), snuggle and watch the rain come down.

If you're so inclined, here's one of my favorite lost love songs. It's called Fade Into You by Mazzy Star. The lyrics are here. Actually I don't know if it's a lost love song--I've just always interpreted it that way.

Au Revoir Cyrille, Bonjour Douleur

aurevoirbonjour

Saturday morning Jay-mon came over to my house at 9:30am. We headed over to Einstein's, got some bagels and met up with Hsin and Chris (fellow Storm mates). We loaded up Hsin's rented Ford Explorer and hit the road to Tucson for our match against the Magpies.

Poor Jay was in insane pain most of the way down south. Everybody throw good positive thoughts his way. He needs to remedy this ruptured disk situation fast, because he's always in pain--even after popping pills.

We got to the pitch at 12:30 and started warming up. Even though it was my first time playing against someone other than teammates in a scrimmage situation, I wasn't nervous at all. I felt really focused on the job at hand.

We played a "friendly match." Instead of two 40 minute halves, we played four 20 minute quarters. And we were allowed unlimited substitutions (in a regular match you only get 7). Since I've never played before I didn't get to start. This actually worked in my favor because I got to see what play was like in real life. Up until now, I have to watch the pros play on Monday nights on Fox Soccer World and that's just not how we're going to play (although our coach wishes we did).

So, we were supposed to play against the Magpies B or C team. Our team has only been in existence for a year. Most of the guys have only played in 3 or 4 matches at most. Our experience and skill level, just isn't there. Therefore, it's essential we play similar teams. Well, the Magpies, decided that they would just play their best players instead.

Our first quarter was a mess. They scored at will. I felt bad for our guys because they looked a bit frustrated.

In the second quarter, I got to play fullback. Basically, this is a defensive position. Mainly because we only have one set offensive play that involves the fullback. For the most part, I roam the back and tackle anyone that breaks through the pack. This also means that if they get to me, they've built up a lot of speed because they've been running a good 10/20 meters. Even though the guys were much bigger, I wasn't afraid to throw myself at them. Our coaches have done a good job at teaching us the proper way to tackle--go for the waist, grab, turn and fall down. It really worked!

But not always. I have to look at their hips and not their eyes--I got juked out three times when I played wing--but that's another story.

Kim told Jeff that the Magpies play dirty. I learned that the hard way. I got pummeled AFTER THE BALL WAS DEAD! The ref blew the whistle to signal stop in play. I trotted over to the ball, picked it up and started jogging to the center of the pitch to give it to the ref. Some jackass came flying out of nowhere and laid me out. I'm talking I flew off the ground and landed 5 feet from where I was standing. My head connected pretty hard on the ground and I was dazed for a sec. But I shook it off, cussed under my breath and kept on going.

The 2nd, 3rd and 4th quarters were much better. They still scored but not often. And our play improved. The forwards were doing a hell of job with the rucks. In the 3rd and 4th quarters I ended up playing wing, due to various injuries to guys. I didn't like it much. But as long as I get to play I don't care.

During one of scuffles, I got a black eye. It's just starting to shine a bit. I'm proud to have it. :-)

I woke up this morning and I could barely move. Everything hurts. Every single muscle in my body aches--especially my abs. Motrin is my friend right now.

I keep replaying all of my mistakes in my head. I can't wait to play in Tempe. It'll give me a chance to redeem myself (I hope). Although I'm beat up, I love this fucking game so much. It's a blast!!!!

So, Hsin and I drove back to Phx after an hour at the drinkup. Hsin had dinner plans and I had to see Cyrille for the last time before he flew back to Vancouver Sunday morning.

We met at Amsterdam. Once again, it was a great time. Despite being very tired and sore, I laughed a lot and enjoyed the company of a lot of friends that I don't see very often. It was difficult to say goodbye to Cyrille. At one point when he was talking to me about how much he enjoyed our time together, I thought he was going to cry. Which made me get all mushy and sad. It was a long and sad goodbye. :-(

Today, I woke up after only 6 hours of sleep. I cleaned, watched Alien vs. Predator and then met Jeff at the movies. We saw the remake of The Fog. It bit the big one. It was as bad as Into the Blue. Ugh. I'm 0 for 2 with movies this week.

Then we headed over to the 5 and Diner. We ate burgers and talked. It was nice to hang one on one for a change. We're always in group settings, so it's good to have a little alone time.

That's it. Hope everyone had good weekends!

Oh l'amour

Cyrille
Originally uploaded by veryapeaz.

My first love, Cyrille, flew into Phoenix last Friday night. He's staying with our friend Aneezah.

Sunday we all met up for brunch at Roscoes. In addition to new friends Jeff, Jay and Steve--there were old friends too -- Aneezah, Charles, Cyrille, George and Susan.

It was like 10 years ago all over again. It was so much fun to talk about old times and catch up on new times. It's amazing that we all pretty much look the same. Nobody's appearance has really changed much--maybe different styles of hair and the clothes are different. But nobody has suddenly gained a great deal of weight or aged in the face.

Wednesday night, Cyrille met me at Roscoes after rugby practice. We had a beer and then went home. When it came time for bed and Cyrille took off his shirt and shorts I think I audibly gasped. I'd forgotten what an amazing body he had.

There was no yadda yadda yadda. We just held each other and talked and eventually drifted off to sleep.

The next day we got up and waited for Ryan to come over. Then we went to Boston Market, Barnes and Noble, Ikea and Sports Authority. The only thing we bought was a hand pump for my rugby ball.

We did go to the movies -- Into the Blue. It should have been called Into the Snooze. Despite having eye candy in the form of Paul Walker (for Cyrille and myself) and Jessica Alba (for Ryan), it was just a really bad movie. It wasn't even Lifetime Movie bad. I didn't even root for the bad guys. I was just bored with it all.

After the movie, I took a nap and Cyrille went to exchange his rental car (it was making a funky noise). Then we went to Chili's and met up with Angi, Aneezah and Susan.

All in all, it was a great visit with Cyrille.

We still love each other very much. And that will never change.

I declined his offer to fool around. I'm not sure why. It's been eight years since we were together and I don't really want to open that can of worms. I mean, he lives in Canada, so nothing will ever come to it.

But it was great to laugh like that again. He makes me laugh like nobody ever has.

And he's sweet. When I went to bed last night, there was a note tucked under the covers, saying that he loved me and was grateful for having me in his life.

:-)

Hello World!

Closet

So today is National Coming Out Day. I wish it were mandatory for everyone who is gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender to just tell all of their friends and family. Their life would be so much more fulfilling.

When I was a wee lad (23), I met a boy. I had a huge crush on him and he liked me. So after going out on a few dates, I figured what the dealio was. I knew I was gay and I knew that it wasn't going to change. This was during finals of my first semester at ASU.

I figured I would tell my family when I got home for Christmas. My sister Sue picked me up from the airport with her son Thomas. He was about 6 at the time, so I figured it wasn't a good time to tell her. But I had to say something because I was going to bust and I wanted her to know first because she and I have always had a good connection.

She dropped me off at my mom's apartment. I told her that I forgot cigarettes and would she drive me to the 7/11. So, I got her to take me to the store. We hadn't even pulled out of the parking lot before I told her I was dating a guy and then burst into tears. I never cry... well I do... every couple of years but that's it (I'm a freak that way). Anyway, she was like, "What's the big deal?"

So, I then went to the rest of my sisters and told them during that weeklong vacation. The funniest time was when my sisters Cathy, Michele and I were playing cards. They were talking about boyfriends and their recent run of good luck.

Michele said, "Cathy just found a new boyfriend. I've got one. Now we just need one for you Teddy," and she laughed hysterically.
I laughed and said, "I already got one." Which made Cathy and Michele laugh even harder. Then I said, "No, I'm serious. I just got one too."
Michele asked, "Are you serious?" and lit up a cigarette.
I said, "Michele, I am serious and you've already got a lit cigarette in your hand."

I'm not exactly sure how it was decided but the girls said they would tell mom and dad after I went back to Phoenix. I'm not sure if we figured it would be easier for them or easier for me--regardless I lucked out not having to tell them. My mom was totally cool with it. But my dad took it really badly. He didn't sleep for over a week. Then he and I wrote letters back and forth for about a year--it was the only way we could communicate. Finally after a year, he was okay with everything.

But the coolest part was my brothers-in-law reactions. Many of them called me up on the phone and asked a bunch of questions. They were completely supportive and very sweet about it.

Once I was out--that was it. It was never an issue with me or other people really. And I've never felt discriminated against or had "an uncomfortable moment." I did have a bizarre moment, when I called up some high school friends to give them the low down. My friend Laura started bawling because she thought we would always get married.
I said, "Laura. You're married now and have two kids!"
She just cried some more and said, "Yeah, but I always thought you and I would end up together!"

So that's my little story.

I find people who aren't out of the closet kind of sad. A psychologist told me that a person who isn't out, is hiding the best part of themselves--the part that loves and cares.

It's also impossible to be in a relationship with closeted guys. What if you fall in love and a year or two later you want to move in together? When the other guy's parents visit, do you have to have a separate bedroom set up and pretend to be roommates? What about holidays? Even if you're invited to his parent's house for holidays, you can't show any affection--hugs or kisses.

That's demeaning and degrades the relationship. It shows a lack of respect for the relationship and the other person in the relationship. Plus, if the dude is lying about who he's dating or in love with to his family and friends--what is he lying about to me?

Ugh... So, people. Just be yourself. It's the only way to live life. I've been true to myself and found myself BLESSED with amazing people in my life. :-)

Saturday Is a Porn Day

Matthew Rush
Originally uploaded by veryapeaz.

There's a rugby song with the lyrics "Saturday is a rugby day." This past Saturday, I had to substitute the word rugby with porn.

It started Friday night at krazyoke. Jason Adonis called while a gaggle of us (including fellow bloggers Jay and Jeffy) were at a local watering hole singing.

Jason was supposed to be in Southern Cal. but ended up not going so he wanted to stop by. He showed up and of course we commenced with the smooching.

Throughout the night, people commented that we were "such a cute couple" and "why don't you get serious about him?"

Here's the problem. Although JA is very hot and we click on a sexual level, there's nothing else there. The three hours we were together at Apollo's we may have exchanged 10 sentences. At least half of those consisted of him telling me he wanted to fool around.

So, that's the story. There's nothing wrong with it -- it is what it is.

So, I dropped George off at my place to get his car. Then I went upstairs and showered off the stench of cigarette smoke, packed my bag of tricks and went up to JA's house, yadda yadda yadda I managed to pull a ribcage muscle and only got three non-consecutive hours of sleep before rugby practice in the morning.

I swear to God his house abuts a goose farm. I heard squawking from what sounded like geese all friggin night. And I'm used to having my wave machine--I need it to fall asleep. And by the time I finally fell asleep JA woke me up for Round II.

After rugby practice, I went home and showered and got ready for my photo shoot with Erin's (a girl in our art department) girlfriend Tracy and Lifetime Falcon Exclusive Matthew Rush.

We had them dress up as Superman and Wonder Woman. They both looked great and Matthew ended up being a very sweet guy. He looks better in person than his pictures. I felt kind of bad for him. I think there's a certain sadness about people who's income is derived solely on their looks. Of course, this could be me projecting....

I went home after the shoot and took a one hour nap. Then I watched Something's Gotta Give and got ready for The Arizona Fetish Ball.

I was covering the fetish ball for X Factor. I met our photographer Edward and his boyfriend Dale outside the venue.

Needless to say, I stuck out like a sore thumb--I wore jeans and a Pearl Jam t-shirt (just in case anyone had a rock music fetish). I guess everybody else's fetishes consists of wearing lycra, leather, studded jock straps and pasties. Although I'm a very open minded person, some of the fetishes just freaked me out.

One guy put hooks in his chest, stomach and legs. They raised him up on these springy coils and then bounced him around. His skin was stretching out so far I thought it would rip. It kind of made me nauseous and I had to stop looking.

There were other exhibits and shows too--like guys zapping girls with electricity or flogging them. It was a 99 percent hetero event. And almost all of the people in collars ended up being guys. The girls definitely wore the pants at that event.

So that was my Saturday. I've had enough porn and fetish stuff to last me for awhile. At least until next weekend. ;-)

Who's Zoomin' Who?

me
Originally uploaded by veryapeaz.

Hello kids!

Here's a picture that Edward (Echo's photog) took of me, taking a picture of him at last weekend's Rainbows Festival.

The week has been busy as always. Let's do a quick recap.

Rugby practice Monday and Wednesday. Wednesday after practice we went to Roscoes as usual. I ended up staying til midnight because Steve showed up (more bout that below).

Tuesday was tennis. I played Matt, my arch-nemesis in the league. We usually play three setters and they're always close. In fact, I think the last time we played, we ended up having three tie breakers.

I've won the past three matches but I wasn't feeling very confident. One, I haven't had much match play since June because of my wrist. Two, my wrist is still very weak and I have to tape it really tight to do anything. Three, I hit with a lot of topspin. It's difficult to do this with a messed up wrist because you have to roll over the ball to create the spin.

The first set, I was down 1-4 before I found my groove. I don't know what happened, but suddenly it felt like the ball was as big as a basketball. And I felt like no matter how hard I hit, the ball would stay in. I battled back to win the first set in a tie-breaker (natch).

During the second set, I broke Matt in the first game. It totally destroyed Matt--he was mentally done, so I ended up cruising to a 6-1 second set victory.

I was really impressed with Jay's play. He played against a guy with a monster serve (I'm talking Andy Roddick fast) on the court next to me, so I kept taking peeks at the score. Although Jay didn't win, he kept the match close.

Before practice Wednesday I had a member of the Phoenix PD pay me a visit in the office. Apparently, the Phoenix PD didn't like an article I wrote about the organization's response to a hate crime against a lesbian. The article was fair and balanced and it was (in my opinion) actually nicer to the PD than it could have been. I mean, this woman (the victim) woke up to find her car bashed up, windows smashed and the words, "I am gay," spray-painted on her car. The responding officers didn't report it as a hate crime. Ummm... hello!!!! For those who don't know, this is a classic case according to Arizona law.

On the boy front. I've been talking to Steve a lot. It's starting to wear on me. I really like him, but he's not out. That's one of my golden rules. It's just not possible to have a healthy dating relationship with someone who is not out.

I have several dating rules. I don't know if I mentioned them before but it's a good time to revisit them. Especially since I need to remind myself that they're there (in case of weak moments).

Anyone I date must follow these rules:

1) Must be out to friends and family (I'll let work environments slide since in Arizona you can be fired for being gay--sad but true).

2) Must have a job. It doesn't matter what it is (dog catcher, sanitation worker, waiter, etc.), as long as the person enjoys it.

3) Must be single. I don't care if you're casually dating other people. However, you can't be in an "open relationship" with a wife or husband.

4) Must have been in love once and have been in one long term (over 1 year) relationship. If you're 35 and have never dated anyone longer than two months, it's never going to happen without serious therapy.

5) Must be physically active. This doesn't mean you have to go to the gym every day or even belong to a gym. It means, the person must exercise through sports or walking or whatever. The older I get, the more I realize it's important to treat your body right--I want my mate to understand that too.

6) Must have a sense of humor. I never realized how many people are sour pusses.

7) Must not be too negative. I'm not a Pollyana but I have a tendency to be upbeat. I like others who are similar. I don't want to be dragged down in other people's misery (and sadly, there are a lot of miserable people out there). :-(

8) Must be independent. I know I can get claustrophobic in a relationship. No matter how much I love someone, I need time to myself. This doesn't mean I'm cheating on the person, this just means I need to have a life outside of the person that I love.

9) Must be trusting. Similar to #8. I automatically trust people (this has gotten me into trouble but it's my nature). When I say something, I mean it and whomever I date must be similar.

So.... that's my list so far. I think there might be another rule or two but these are the big ones.

This will be a fun weekend. My first love, Cyrille (the crazy Frenchman) is flying in tonight for a week's stay. He's staying with different friends throughout the course of the week. Wednesday night he'll be staying at my pad and I'm taking the day off Thursday, so we can have some quality time together.

Saturday I've got to go to a photo shoot for Echo's next cover. One of our models is a porn star. Saturday evening, I'm covering the Arizona Fetish Ball for X Factor. Sunday, I'm going to Roscoes for football and brunch!

Will post with weekend details later.

These Boots Were Made for Walking

Babs

What a weekend!

Friday afternoon, Tim, Travis and I set up Echo's booth for the Rainbows Festival. As we were setting up a girl and two guys in their early 20's walked by and asked what Rainbows was all about and why it was being held. I said, "It's like any other festival. To eat and drink." Travis added, "And be Mary." ;-)

So yes, Rainbows is similar to gay pride but it's only got one stage and more people end up dancing. It's a lot of fun. And this year it was twice the fun as previous years because it ran two days.

It was so flipping hot though. It's still over 100 degrees here in the Valley of the (neverending) Sun. So, when we were done, I went home, showered and crashed on the couch for an hour. Then I went to Jason Adonis' house. We had a beer and then went to Honey Bear's Bar B Que. Yum! We hung out, yadda yadda yadda, I was home and in bed by midnight.

Saturday I got up at 7 for rugby practice. I think there were only 7 of us (and that's including two coaches). Then I rushed home, showered, made an egg sandwich and headed up to the festival. I worked the Echo booth from 11-1, switched shirts and worked the rugby booth until 3:30 or so.

Jeffie came over, we walked around and then went to the grocery store. I crashed on his couch for a half hour and then we ate some DELICIOUS casserole, stringy squash (I normally don't eat squash but Jeff is an amazing cook and makes it taste good--must be all the MSG he throws on there) and Blueberry cake for dessert.

Then I went home and was in bed by 11. Sunday I went back to the festival and drank and drank and drank. I hung out with this guy Steve, with which I've chatted online. It's weird, although Jason Adonis and I share this mutual attraction thing and we have a lot of common interests, we hardly ever talk. I've never shared a comfortable conversation with him--it always seems forced. Despite the fact that I met Steve in person for the first time this weekend, we spent the whole day talking up a storm. Unfortunately, Steve is not out--which is against my ever growing list of red flags, so he's not dating material. However, he's cool to have as a friend and that's not bad.

Sunday, my friend Richard hosted the entertainment portion of Rainbows. That's him in the picture above doing his rendition of Jessica Simpson's rendition of Nancy Sinatra's "These Boots are Made for Walking." I'm always amazed watching him. He's truly entertaining and blows away everybody else.

Oh... I did have a scary moment on Sunday. I was standing outside the rugby booth, grabbing men and women to sign up for Storm Rugby, either as a player, sponsor, volunteer or just to watch the games. I grabbed this one guy who was about 6'3" and built like a Mac truck. I told him he should play with us.

He decided to go into hooker mode, grabbed me and said he wanted to have sex with me. Actually, it wasn't that polite but you get the idea. I told him I was flattered but wasn't he more interested in playing rugby???? He tried kissing me a few times and I was able to fend him off.

It was a weird experience. The other rugby guys were no more than 15 feet away but completely oblivious to what was going on. Because the guy was talking in a low voice, so it wasn't obvious what he was saying. The guy was really creeping me out. Fortunately, Steve came over and saved my ass (figuratively AND literally).

There were a lot of other fun moments too:
--I ran into this guy Adrian. I hadn't seen him in over 10 years. We used to go out drinking all of the time when we were wee lads.
--I bitched about missing Desperate Housewives; Steve grabbed my hand and pulled me out of Charlie's and drove me to his house to watch it. Then we went back to Charlie's for a bit.
--Got to hang with my friend Mark, who disappeared from my life for awhile.
--A lot of the rugby guys bought kilts and walked around without underwear.
--The newly single Jay cruised every guy who walked by the booth.
--I barked at Greg to buy me a beer and he did.

All in all, a GREAT weekend.