Serendipitous

I'm still in Vegas and it's been a total blast.

But let me tell you some things I've learned in the four days:

I've learned that any money earned at the Wheel of Fortune machine and horse races are quickly erased at the Blackjack table.

I've learned that walking from the Luxor to the Stratosphere takes HOURS and that my feet will never recover.

I've learned that there is too much to see and do. There's so much more to LV than gambling.

I've learned that drinking a 40 of Smirnoff Ice and walking down the street is both refreshing and liberating.

I've learned that anyone afraid of heights (me) should not go on top of the Stratosphere and get on Big Shot; unless they want to scream like a little girl--I'm sure my screams are reaching the Space Station about now.

I've also learned that despite the fact that my father will turn 70 this year he's got insane speed and stamina when walking; he thinks that a 3-minute mile is slow.

Hanging with the family has been great and they all loved SJ, so it's sad that I leave tomorrow. I'll post more w/pix later.

HAPPY TUNESDAY MOTHERFUCKERS!

I really loved the fountains at the Bellagio. During one of the most memorable moments of the trip, the fountains were choreographed to Your Song. And since Elton is now a Vegas fixture, I thought it was an appropriate song. But instead of using his version, I've got the Moulin Rouge version. I like it a lot. I didn't upload this myself, I'm borrowing someone else's link. So I hope it works.

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Song

Get Out of My Way!

roadrage
Originally uploaded by veryapeaz.

I am taking three whole vacation days starting Friday. That means I have a lot to do in a little time. Fortunately, Buddy is doing most of the writing for this issue and just gave me a few little assignments.

But I also need to get my freelance stuff done before I leave Friday morning, because I don't own a laptop. I will have to use the hotel's business center as it is for a few tasks that need to be done Monday. I don't want to be stuck writing for hours while everyone else is watching Celine Dion.

Ok. Yes, I do.

I've also got a lot of errands to run. This means getting into my car and driving. This is not good. I get the worst cases of road rage ever. All it takes is ONE car driving the speed limit and my head starts to explode.

Did you ever see Madeline Kahn in Clue?
"Yes, I did it. I killed Yvette. I hated her so... much... it... it... the... it... the... flames... flames... on the side of my face... heaving... breathless... heaving breaths." Listen here.

Why are these people on the road if they can't drive ten over like the rest of us (20 over if the speed limit is 45 or below)? As the scholar Sammy Hagar once pontificated, I can't drive 55 (unless it's a school zone... then I'll slow down to 50--j/k).

I'm a relatively unflappable and mild-mannered kind of guy--except on the rugby pitch. And when I get behind the wheel of a car. Unless, I have a passenger--then I relax.

The problem is, I don't think it's fair that it should take 30 minutes to go 15 miles. Why can't any scientist figure out the whole teleportation thing? That way, we wouldn't be so dependent on oil. And the Arab nations could go back to doing what they do best--protecting our nation's harbors (whoops, that was editorializing on a completely different subject).

Anywho. I probably won't blog for a week. I'm going to try to prep everything for next Tunesday, so when I take care of my freelance stuff Monday night, I can quickly post.

I come back Tunesday night--that's Mardi Gras people. I'm expecting SJ to pick me up at the airport with a lot of beads in hand. :-P

Wise Men Say...

I had a really nice weekend. Friday, SJ and I joined the Echo crew for the opening night of OutFar! Gay & Lesbian Film Festival. It was hosted by our own Barbra Seville.

I like doing things like that. Working at Echo has given me the opportunity to do things I normally wouldn't do--like go to a gay film festival.

The first movie was a short called The D Word--a takeoff of The L Word. It sucked.

Then there was an intermission with some great food by Fez. The second movie, Adam and Steve was fucking hysterical. I laughed my ass off a lot. And it had Parker Posey in it. She is turning into one of my favorite actresses. I never saw her until Scream 3. She stole every scene she was in. And then I saw her in Best in Show and Waiting for Guffman. She's just great.

I spent the night Friday and we got up and drank coffee and talked. I love when I get to do that with SJ. It's the best time. We half watch TV but mostly talk about anything and everything and drink coffee. It's like Coffee Talk, but sometimes funnier.

Saturday night we went to a party at his friend's house. We invented a new game. Every time the word "vegetarian" was said, we had to drink. That's because I heard the word "vegetarian" more in 60 minutes than I had in the past 12 months of my life. The people at the party were the Bohemian type. Very interesting.

SJ's friend Jen M. was there and had me crying. She's so fucking funny. After the party we headed to an Irish Pub for beers with my friend Aneezah and then it was time for bed.

Sunday, we headed to Tim and Mel's for their 20th anniversary and Tim's 40th birthday. I drank way too many mojitos and had to leave early to take a nap. Before I left, I took this great picture of Joe and Jeff.

OK. So why do I have Crystal Gale up? I'm letting my hair grow out. It's a messy look and I'm using (GASP!) hair product. So, it's shocking to others and myself. But it's fun to be different every once in awhile.

HAPPY TUNESDAY MOTHERFUCKERS!
Friday I'm leaving on a little vacation. I can't wait for it to happen. I'm headed up to Vegas for the first time ever. So I give you Pearl Jam's homage to Elvis. This song was recorded at a concert played 10 years to the day after Pearl Jam's first concert ever. And it just happened to be in Vegas.

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Housekeeping

I've been away for a week and a half on a meth binge. No, I'm not doing crystal meth. I've just spent the past two weeks talking to health officials, users, dealers and the like for a special feature on crystal meth and the gay community.

It's been a dark two weeks.

For the weeks leading up to the feature my editor and I have been arguing over the severity of crystal meth. I think it's been overplayed by the media. Buddy said no.

I was wrong.

It's amazing what people will do on this drug. I've always had a fairly liberal and libertarian view on drugs. But unlike pot or coke or even liquor, people who do meth can't walk away. That's not true. Very few people can walk away.

For the most part, however, people who just experimented once with meth find themselves turned into junkies within a year's time. And these aren't necessarily lower income people with little education. These are boardroom excecutives and lawyers and other well-educated folks.

What's worse is the aftermath. IF users were able to come clean, they found themselves: infected with HIV, STDs, homeless, penniless, having no teeth and sometimes having minds so fucked up that they will never go back to normal. Plus, they struggle EVERYDAY with not doing the drug YEARS after their last bump of crystal.

It affects the gay community a lot because the drug is highly sexual in nature. And gay men love their sex. They're men after all. And since American society loves to tell gay men how evil and despicable they are, it's easy for gay men to become despondent. Often gay men have issues with sexuality because they hear nothing but negativity. So it's easy to turn to drugs to make them feel comfortable doing something that is natural to them--having sex.

Anyway. I wrote about 4,000 words on the subject and feel like it's a cursory look at best. I wish I could have had an additional 4,000 words to write on the subject and a little more time to research it. But I also had four other stories to write, so I can't complain too much. I have to thank Buddy a lot for clearing out more space in the magazine than originally planned. And Erin did a beautiful job laying it out. I'm glad the whole affair is over. I do not want to have to talk or think about meth for awhile. The article comes out next Thursday, so be sure to check it out online next week.

BUT LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT MY INCREDIBLE VALENTINE'S DAY

I went over to Joe's house after work and felt like a scrub. He greeted me in a suit and tie and looked incredibly sexy and hot. So, I jumped in the shower to clean up. When I got out of the shower, I could smell something really good cooking. As I was shaving, Joe ran into his bedroom and turned on the radio -- Pearl Jam was playing. And it wasn't something you'd hear on the radio like Jeremy or Evenflow, it was Hard to Imagine. A really pretty slow song.

After shaving I went into the kitchen to see assorted pots steaming up some great seafood. Crab legs, shrimp and lobster tail. YUM! So I drank a beer and watched him cook. As this was going on, more Pearl Jam was coming out of the radio. And it was all really good slow songs -- spanning the last ten years. I was amazed and touched.

We had a nice dinner and talked about his day (he had an interview). Then he jumped in the shower and put on his PJs. Then we exchanged some presents. He got me a Pearl Jam DVD and this kick ass Phoenix Suns sweatshirt. I gave him a mix CD that took me DAYS to make. I couldn't get the right flow and I kept adding and subtracting songs. I've decided I'm not very good at it. Then I got him some Starbucks beans and a coffee bean grinder -- because he's addicted to Starbucks. And I gave him some pictures and a frame to put them in.

Then to cap off his themed evening (the theme was "An Ode to Things Ted Likes"), he bought the DVD for The Long Kiss Goodnight--one of my all-time favorite movies--and we watched that. Gena Davis just kicks ass and the writing is really crisp.

So, it was just a wonderful wonderful evening.

I wish I could do something really cool like that for him sometime. I often get little ideas but then I don't follow through. I DEFINITELY have to follow through with SJ. He's just so amazing that I want him to feel half as special as he makes me feel.


FINALLY
I want to thank everyone for helping out with the MS Walk. I REALLY appreciate it. I'm going to get a list from Lorraine and send out thank you cards. I'm honestly a bit overwhelmed by everyone's generosity. It was unexpected but definitely appreciated.

Thank you all very very very very very much!!!

Run Joey Run

Let me talk a little about my sister Michele. Michele is the youngest of the girls (she's five years older than me). This means she was the baby for FIVE WHOLE YEARS until I came along. Not only was I the new baby but I was the ONLY boy in the family. So this meant that all of that focus that was on her for so long shifted away from her.

She was a pretty good sport about it. We had our share of fights in the younger days but I would say for the most part we've had a great relationship.

Some of my funniest moments in history occurred with Michele--mostly because she has this infectious laugh that pops up at the most inopportune times, such as at my Grandmother's funeral. She started laughing (once she starts it never ends) so my mother had to take her head and thrust it down into my mom's lap. Everyone just thought Michele was sobbing.

When she came out to visit me in AZ the first time I graduated from ASU, all of my friends were just amazed. They all said, "She looks just like Ted... in DRAG!" We just tell people we're fraternal twins born five years apart.

One time Michele and I went to the beach with our sisters. She and I wanted to lay out at the beach on our last day. We got some sun but then we were exhausted from the heat. So we got our butts (full of sand) in the car and started making the three hour trek home. We were hot and cranky and tired.

We tried listening to the radio but her radio was messed up. So we would get a station and start singing to 20 seconds of the song and then it was nothing but static. We kept switching stations, hear a song and sing and then hear, "Shhhhhhhh." Which turned into a pretty good joke by the end of the drive. Then my right contact decided to flip over as I was driving. So I was screaming at her to take the wheel because I was blind. She's screaming at me and laughing hysterically (cuz that's what she does) and managed to pull us to the side of the highway while I fixed my contact.

Another great beach moment was when I dragged her to Rehobeth Beach (a gay beach in Delaware) with some of my friends. She, my friend Jeremy and I were sharing a room. We let Jeremy book the room. Big mistake.

We walk into the room and there's one super king sized bed. They were all booked up so the three of us ended up sleeping in it. After we checked into the room, we walked up to the beach and down the boardwalk. Michele said, "Gosh! It stinks like fish here." I said, "Oh, this must be the lesbian side of the beach."

There was also a time when she and three of her girlfriends smoked some weed and went to see Cinderella in the movie theater. As soon as Cinderella started singing in her high voice, it was all over for Michele. There went the laugh. I wasn't there to witness it, but hearing her tell the story is probably funnier than the real story itself.

So I'm blogging about Michele because she has Multiple Sclerosis. She didn't have any symptoms until she came out to AZ in 2000 for a visit. I guess MS can be triggered by intense heat.

She's doing amazingly well with it. She has some bad days but she's on medicine which keeps it mostly in check.

Every year, my sister Lorraine walks 30 miles in two days to help raise money for MS. This is an arduous task but she loves being able to help out. In order to be eligible to walk, Lorraine has to raise $1,500. I figured that since I get almost 3,000 unique visitors (most of them are bots but still...) to my blog each month, each person could donate a buck. If you can't, it's not a big deal. If you can, that's great. Everything is appreciated!

If you'd like to help out, click this link.

Happy Tunesday Motherfuckers!
Michele and I have a lot of songs we love to sing. But our favorite songs are the cheesy ones from the 70s. We had a lot of 45s in our house and they got played a lot. One of the worst songs (besides Seasons in the Sun, Loving You and Convoy--there were so many!) is Run Joey Run by David Geddes. Everything about this song stinks--the angels singing in the background, Julie screaming, "WATCH OUT!" and the entire premise. For your listening pleasure and for Michele, here's Run Joey Run.

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Song

Could I Buy Some Healthy Air Please?

pollution
Originally uploaded by veryapeaz.

As my friend Ted McCarthy would say, "I'm not a complainer but.."

I've been sick for almost a week. I went to the doc, because I could have sworn I had strep throat. My throat is so flipping raw. It hurts to swallow and I've been popping ibuprofen every four hours, to no avail.

The doc said that it's not the flu and it's not strep. It's my allergies. Unfortunately, Phoenix is not conducive to my health. When I went to the allergist a few years ago he said, "You can take medicine or move but you'll always have problems living here."

Sometimes my allergies get so bad that I have problems breathing -- my chest feels really heavy. At first my allergist thought I might have asthma, but it's not that. It's just that I'm allergic to a lot of things that bloom here in the Valley.

When you add terrible pollution and the fact that we haven't had rain in 4 months to wash away the crap, it's a horrible combination. So I'm not supposed to go outside until I get better. Maybe I could borrow the bubble boy's equipment for rugby practice.

The only mitigating circumstance in all of this is I've got a sexy boyfriend who doesn't mind staying indoors with me. =-D